Archive for the ‘What the ...’ Category

The George W. Bush Shit Factory

Friday, July 11th, 2008

From Aunty

If at least 7,168 of those signatures are found to be valid, the question of whether to rename Oceanside Water Pollution Control Plant after the outgoing president will be added to the ballot papers in November.

“In President Bush’s case, we think that we will be cleaning up a substantial mess for the next 10 or 20 years,”

“The sewage treatment facility’s job is to clean up a mess, so we think it’s a fitting tribute.”

a city official stressed that Oceanside offered “extraordinary environmental benefits”

What the … `dsw`

Thursday, July 10th, 2008

Ever heard of the UNIX command `dsw` ?

No, neither had I, until I read this

The other day I was, for reasons known only to myself, reading the manuals that came with First Edition Unix. This wasn’t the first time I’d read them, but I noticed something new this time.

There was a manual page for a command known as ‘dsw’. Obviously, this was the command used to interactively remove files (the equivalent, in modern parlance, of ‘rm -i’).

What struck me, however, was this little tidbit from the notes section:

The name dsw is a carryover from the ancient past. Its

etymology is amusing but the name is nonetheless ill—

advised.

Well, obviously, that’s a mystery in need of solving. I’ll admit that not all Unix commands are clearly named, but this one was obscure even by those standards.

I spent some of my time this past weekend looking up the answer. (Hey, what can I say? I know how to party!) The answer came from an old page on Bell Labs’ website discussing Unix history.

It turns out, the name is a loose abbreviation of “delete from switches”. Of course!

But, what are these switches, you ask?

Well, this edition of Unix ran on a machine from DEC called the PDP-11 (with 24KW of memory and no memory protection). The PDP-11, like most machines of that vintage, had a collection of switches on the front of its chassis. These switches were known by various names: “console switches”, “front-panel switches”, and so on.

These switches were used for a variety of purposes. One main use was to deposit values in memory before the operating system was loaded. It was by this laborious method bootloaders were placed into memory that would then read the rest of the operating system from tape or disk.

(The legendary Seymour Cray was famed for being able to switch in a bootloader from memory.)

On machines with a bootloader in ROM, these switches had less of a purpose, usually just for debugging or configuration purposes. The PDP-11 used by the original Unix developers had such a bootloader, and therefore, these switches were woefully underutilized.

The original version of ‘dsw’ didn’t have much of a user interface. Modern interactive file deletion commands do something like the following:

* Get a list of files in the directory.
* For each file, print out its name.
* Wait for the user to confirm deletion of the file.
* Repeat until there are no more files in the list.

‘dsw’ eschewed this obviously over-complicated interface by using the aforementioned woefully underutilized console switches.

To interactively delete files in the current directory, the user would decide how many files appeared in the directory listing before the doomed file. They would then set the console switches to that number (in octal, of course), and run ‘dsw’. The program would then read that number of filenames from the directory, store the name of the last file it encountered in its own process memory, print out that name, and then crash.

The crash would produce a core dump (a raw representation of the contents of memory when the program crashed).

To confirm the deletion the named file, the user could then run the core file. That is, rather than running ‘dsw’ again, they would read the contents of the core dump directly back into memory and jump back to that code.

This would cause the ‘dsw’ instance stored in the core file to read from memory the name of the last file it had encountered and delete it.

In this manner, you could be sure that you would not delete a file unless you really meant to.

This all could be a complete lie, but it is entertaining none the less.

What the … Toe Straightening

Thursday, July 10th, 2008

I think I may have just seen everything, well at the very least too much, Yoga Toes, the toe stretcher for people who wear shoes that they really in all seriousness shouldn’t, but hey if you are vain enough to wear them, you are probably vain enough to get your toes straightened again.

What the … Reiser F’s

Wednesday, July 9th, 2008

This Wikipedia edit shows a particularly cruel Hans Reiser joke.

Admittedly when I say cruel, I mean it is cruel, but if he hadn’t killed his wife it wouldn’t be funny now would it ?

Sparkle Buns

Wednesday, July 9th, 2008


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OrUWFYkbcmg

Please do not try to recreate any of the hilarious antics in this video, this video is for entertainment purposes only, if you hurt yourself as a result of recreating this stunt, we will laugh at you for being a dumb, or should that be numb ass.

What the … Windows CON

Thursday, June 26th, 2008

I don’t know if this is true, and certainly have no way of testing it, but is it possible to create a directory called CON on Windows ? and if you so can you delete it ?

Answers on a postcard to the usual address.

UPDATE : Brad confirmed it on XP.

What the … Sudoku aborts trial

Tuesday, June 10th, 2008

From SMH

AFTER 105 witnesses and three months of evidence, a drug trial costing $1 million was aborted yesterday when it emerged that jurors had been playing Sudoku since the trial’s second week.

More than 20 police gave evidence in the case, in which the two accused faced a common charge of conspiracy to manufacture a commercial quantity of amphetamines. One faced further firearms and drug possession indictments. The prosecution and defence were due to deliver final addresses to the jury this week.

But last week, as one of the accused was giving evidence, he saw the jury forewoman playing what he thought was Sudoku. His co-accused saw it too, and the defence counsel, Adam Morison and Michael Coroneos, made a joint application for a discharge.

four or five jurors had brought in the Sudoku sheets and photocopied them to play during the trial and then compare their results during meal breaks.

She admitted to having spent more than half of her time in court playing the game. The trial, which started on March 4, has cost more than $1 million, including counsels’ fees, staff wages and court running costs for 60 days of hearings. Judge Zahra, who had previously commended the jury for its apparent diligence, told the forewoman that the Sudoku players had let down their fellow jurors and all involved in the trial.

There is no offence under the NSW Jury Act for playing games or being inattentive to a degree that causes a trial to be abandoned.

The office of the Director of Public Prosecutions must now decide whether to recommence the proceedings against the men.

Thanks to Jess for forwarding me this one.

UPDATE : A murder trial has been halted, and will have to start again due to a ruling by the British law lords on anonymous witnesses, from Aunty

Law Lords ruled that defendants had a right to know the identity of those testifying against them.

Four witnesses had given evidence under false names and from behind screens during the two-month trial of the two men accused of killing Charles Butler in Dagenham, east London, in 2004.

In their ruling, the Law Lords argued it has been a fundamental principle of English Law that the accused should be able to see his accusers and challenge them.

Judge Paget said it would be “frankly impossible” to ask the jury to forget what they had heard from anonymous witnesses.

He told the jury: “You have heard evidence from a number of witnesses that you should not have heard.”

the Law Lords had given their ruling “because of the difficulties caused to the defence if they do not know the identity of witnesses against them and are deprived of investigating why these people may be inaccurate or, worst, untruthful”.

“It’s fundamentally important that we are able to protect, in very, very rare cases, anonymity of witnesses, otherwise we’re not able to get justice for people.”

“Intimidation of witnesses is a very serious problem, but a balance must be found which protects them without compromising the integrity of the trial.”

I have to say in all fairness that I agree with the law lords ruling, civil liberties are already eroding faster than ever in the UK, and there is a real threat of some kafkaesque bureaucratic legal system. On the other hand I appreciate the seriousness of needing to protect witnesses. I am not sure what the solution is that balances both of these factors, but I have faith that there is one, I doubt however we shall see it practiced any time soon due to many pending cases which can be thrown out, or even old ones such as the automated speeding ticket.

Fly Japan

Tuesday, May 27th, 2008

Aunty

An unwitting passenger arriving at Japan’s Narita airport has received 142g of cannabis after a customs test went awry

A customs officer hid a package of the banned substance in a side pocket of a randomly chosen suitcase in order to test airport security.

Sniffer dogs failed to detect the cannabis and the officer could not remember which bag he had put it in.

Anyone finding the package has been asked to contact customs officials.

The customs officer conducted the test on a passenger’s bag against regulations. Normally a training suitcase is used.

“I knew that using passengers’ bags is prohibited, but I did it because I wanted to improve the sniffer dog’s ability,”

Japan has strict laws against drugs and possession of small amounts of cannabis can lead to a prison sentence.

Pii Pii

Thursday, May 22nd, 2008

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQNKRDFanQE

Available now at ThinkGeek, Super Pii Pii Brothers !

Product Features:

* Video Game for Nintendo Wii Provides a Virtual Peeing Experience
* Amazing Realistic Pee Fluid Dynamics
* Imported from Japan
* Comes with game disc and Wiimote belt harness
* Includes cross regional boot disc to allow play on US Wii consoles
* Minimal Japanese text makes game easy to understand if you can’t read Japanese
* Over 100 different peeing environments with multiple toilet and urinal styles
* Up to two players can compete with dueling pee streams

Dueling pee streams, eh ? how can you resist ?

Sloth

Tuesday, May 13th, 2008

Aunty

Sloth’s lazy image ‘a myth’

ok

The sloth’s popular image as a lazy creature that sleeps for most of the day has been called into question.

Rather than snoozing for more than 16 hours a day, as observed in captivity, sloths in the wild doze for less than 10 hours

Wish I could sleep ten hours a day, lazy sloths

The findings, published in a Royal Society journal, may help shed light on human sleep disorders

like what ? if humans lived in captivity we’d spend more time sleeping ?

“I think this finding is really going to open the door to a whole new age of sleep research on animals sleeping in their natural habitat.”

you hope so, because your grant cheque depends on it

Animals vary in the amount of sleep they need. Pythons, for example, sleep for 18 hours a day, while giraffes survive on just two hours.

lazy pythons

Despite many years of research into the function of sleep, there are still many unresolved questions.

It is known that sleep plays an important role in maintaining normal mental functions, but the precise mechanisms are unclear.